Why Christmas Trees

I am not writing this blog to hurt anyone, these details can get deep, and many people would look the other way when faced with this kind of stuff. To be honest, there are parts of this life that I shouldn’t have looked away from, but I did and I am very sorry I did. I promised myself that mind, body & soul I was going to get my life right. Now it’s quickly moving in the right direction.

It will take a few blogs to explain this truly overpowering story and chain of events. I know without a doubt, that the time is now to give up my nearly 16 year career in corporate America. To be honest, with the chain of events, and the knowledge that I have learned since, I am nearly certain it was going to happen even if I didn’t choose to jump. I am giving it up to chase a 22 year old dream of growing Christmas trees and building a “Choose & Cut” Christmas tree farm & experience.

OK, stopping right there, let me explain something in the wrong frame of mine, this entire idea currently scares the dickens out of me! But after a series of “perfectly” timed events in my life, I have no doubts this is what I am supposed to be doing with my life right now. Every time my mind flutters on the plan & events, It quickly gets a correction by someone that seems to be a spy in my mind, seeing the doubts, and clearly erasing them.

Here is the set up that makes the meat of this story make sense. Many people know of my efforts and works the last few years, I will do anything I can when I see children hurting, or in a tough situation with family and friends. I am a believer that it’s not about what you take with you when you die, it’s what you leave behind. Yes, I am a child of divorced parents, the events that led up to that divorce shaped me to who I am today. There are many things that I won’t put in this blog, but I will sum these events up this way. Alcohol & abuse can ruin families and set in motion a very nasty chain of events that ruins many lives for many years. I did not learn how to do stuff the right way, I learned the wrong, and had to find the right way. I promised myself young in my life, I would not follow in the footstep I was being taught from.

This leads into the why Christmas Trees? There are two reasons, in high school, we had 400 acres of land that the FFA department managed. One area was a Christmas tree field, I remember many times, begging to mow the field, so I could escape school, and go to a place that I found truly peaceful. Our next door neighbors to the land we had in Dalton, NH also had Christmas trees planted in their fields. I would take the dogs for walks, and routinely walk the rows to trees, It was my peaceful place. I remember times of laying on the ground in these rows of trees for long durations of time, just escaping life.

The second reason, Christmas became my favorite holiday. At Christmas, family gathered, and the events and pains of my childhood stopped being painful. Maybe it was only for a few hours or days, but it was happy times, getting gifts that you wanted and begged for all year, but couldn’t have them. Getting to see family that you hadn’t seen in a long time. Don’t get me wrong, my childhood wasn’t all bad, there was a lot of good, and to be honest the bad revolved around one thing, alcohol. I truly believed it was the devil in a bottle.

Now why today, to start to tell this story. Today is my grandfather, Robert P. Bigelow’s Birthday, This man was the light in many dark days. He was the man that taught me like a father how to live the right way, how to love, even when times were tough. No need for fancy things, just truly caring, and enjoying life. I was truly honored to give his eulogy at his funeral, and the words I spoke then, I am living now, my soul has been awakened, I am investing my life in what I truly love. I love the true spirit of Christmas, and I will make that spirit, and nurturing it my job, and the base of my living.

If you’re still reading this, this is just the beginning. This story gets to be over powering, I am a true believer that god has stepped into my life, to turn me around from a sinking ship, and will tell you how… I leave you with the video “Dream.”

It came into my life at a dark time, and provided a huge light!